LoveSexandTea Almost Done!

sexloveandtea almost doneSexLoveandTea Almost Done!

Hi guys! So, its been quite a while since I’ve written. I hope those of you who know me, aren’t disappointed I haven’t been here for a while. I’ve actually been working on building the new site, LoveSexandTea.com. I do like the idea of keeping a brand and building it over time, however, it was either bring everything into this site, or create a new name and merge everything over there!

So, I’m taking votes: would you like to see this site still live? Or fine with letting it go to the new brand?

What I left to do with the new site is edit the posts for readability, the photos having been properly uploaded, or adding new photos to the current posts, and add a couple new videos for the new theme, new focus of this work. I’ve removed all the content on MyLoverMyBestFriend.wordpress.com. I’ve removed all the content from IntuitiveSoulHealings.com, and transferred all the content from those sites and this site all over to LoveSexandTea.com. No, it is not live yet. I want to fix the posts and add some videos, and for the most part, it will be done then! I could easily make it live now, as it looks great, and 9 years worth of posts will take quite some time to edit.

Feel free to reach out to me! I’m here and available!

By the way, I’ve gotten some requests for Erotic Massage. People, I don’t do erotic massage, so please look elsewhere. I do Tantra Massage. They are quite different. If you don’t know the difference, please do your research and study spirituality. The connection between spirit and the body is at the crux of tantra, and it is completely separate from eroticism.

I’m taking a Flower Essence Certification, A homeopathy Course, a couple computer and video courses, and looking into a couple more things to make this work even more great! I am a Coach and a Healer! If you truly want things to improve in your relationship, your sex life, and your spiritual life, I am your girl!

Anything else, you would like me to share, please let me know!

Are you voting? Have you done all your research there? There’s what the media says, and what you find when you really dig! I’ve been a Democrat for the past 20 years, but please consider what each candidate believes in and stands for! Please do your homework! It’s almost over!

sexloveandtea almost done

Notice: Merging all Sites into One

Notice: Merging All Sites Into One

Newsflash, Wake up Call to Those Seeking Tantra, A Hello to those seeking help for their Relationships and Marriages, A Jump start to Sexual Shamanism, Spiritual Teachings, Energy Alchemy and Workings, and tools for Releasing Core Emotions and Armored Feelings. Asttarte is here, and back!!!! Yes, that’s me, the person who created this site, and your committed lover of Healing, lover of love and Sexuality, lover of Tantra and Emotional Healing, personal development, Yoga and Energy Healing, lover of massage, empowering and helping women and couples, and also your lover of Natural Healing and Herbology/Homeopathy/Aromatherapy/ and Natural Medicine!

Ok, the title is Almost accurate, but I have to keep the title somewhat short! I am NOT getting rid of my site for women! That will remain in tact, however, my spiritual site gets hardly any hits, and this site gets TONS! My site for women has too much potential and so many of my peers, tantra educators and healer friends want me to keep it up to do group work with them, and there’s a need to help women that is very separate to my sites for men, so I’m keeping it. That’s not the point of this post, however!

I posted a Note on Facebook, which I made public, about my newfound love for herbology, my new awareness of my own healing journey of Lyme Disease, my love for understanding how natural healing can help the body, and a journey I am exploring to add more skills to my current Coaching practice! I am looking at taking an Herbal Practitioner Training next year, to 1). help me learn how to continue to heal my own Lyme situation and possibly coach others, and 2). To help my current and new clients with health related issues, especially men who have erectile dysfunction and prostate issues, menopause, cervical, and uterine issues for women, among anyone who wants to learn how to lose weight naturally, to detox, and cleanse the organs, and not spend a ton of money on a diet program .

What’s exciting about this new development is a new brand, and one that makes even more sense to me than my current brand of TrueTantra! What am I calling this new brand? And why am I considering changing my business name? Let’s be straight here! Most people looking for the key word “Tantra” are looking for a spiritual approach to helping them learn how to help their sex lives, improve their spirituality as well as are looking for answers to their sexual frustration. In many cases, people who call me, still want a straight up erotic massage! Sometimes they are honest about this up front, and most of the time they hint at it later, not being honest until the moment they want it and they are laying on my healing mat, and sometimes, thankfully, they tell me in the forms on my Asttarte site, or over the phone when we are talking.

The New Brand is going to be called….drum roll please:¬†LoveSexandTea! Why LoveSexandTea? Simple!!! Obviously, a name like LoveSexandCoffee wouldn’t go well with a Tantra Practitioner, that would be the fast track to intimacy and sex! Tantra, love and Intimacy is about taking your time, building the energy, foreplay for the soul, spirit and body! (And there’s a well known woman who’s a Chef with that name that cooks for children, which has nothing to do with my practice in the least! I don’t plan on being a chef and have no intentions of teaching classes on cooking for kids, not that I know of at least. The only thing I’d be interested in doing in that department might be teaching kids yoga, reading, writing or creating music with kids, and possibly at some point being an educator in schools for young women and men on sexuality and personal growth. For now, let’s stay focused on the topic!)

To answer, why change the brand name? I love the new name, but if any of you suggest to keep it as is, please comment here and give me your thoughts!

LoveSexandTea is a great title for a Radio Show, a Youtube Channel, a book, a great title for relationships, couples, marriages, taking ones time to learn tantra, slow sex, tea and herbology for natural healing, and Tantra!

 

 

Viagra vs Tantra Transformation

Viagra vs Tantra Transformation
Viagra vs Tantra Transformation

There are many sources of what is causing your erection to not be as strong as it used to be, and if we find out the source, often we can also find the solution!

I’ve been doing tantra healing work now for over 14 years, and it’s amazing, but even more amazing is having added the tools of tantra, to my previous Reiki Master training, and Energy Healer trainings, along with Life Coaching and Psychotherapy tools. If I hadn’t had all that training, I probably wouldn’t be able to say that I can help someone with sexual dysfunction issues, or trauma stuck in his or her sacral chakra, or solar plexus, heart chakra, or somewhere else.

So what’s amazing, is that I find people who are on the fence with getting viagra, and have heard tons of horrible stories about it, and I stop them right there, and say, “Please DON’T take that stuff!” Too many bad stories about it, and way to dangerous! But what I do tell them is that I might be able to help. Most guys are looking for their erection. They wonder why they have gone limp, and often they are in a long term relationship or marriage when this happens. Most of the guys I have had success with this are 60 and younger. The guys older than this, the success rate is less, because it turns into a health issue and then we have to address the health. I don’t have as much experience of success helping it from a health standpoint, but I am learning and may take some further training so I do have more success.

However, if it is psychological, mental, emotional, or an energetic or spiritual reason, I can certainly help! Often it is one of these. For example, if you’re having trouble with your erection, but you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, most of the time, it is due to issues within the relationship, and we will move into Relationship Coaching to discuss the patterns in the relationship, or issues that might be causing some distance. If you don’t feel distant from your partner, and the relationship is going well, then it is an issue with yourself, something internal you are feeling, something you need to process and let go of, or perhaps something you need to forgive yourself for, or someone else.

Another example, if you are angry at your girlfriend/wife/partner and you are unable to get aroused, there’s your answer; the anger. Perhaps you have suppressed the anger and think you can ignore it, but then your body is telling you clearly that you cannot ignore it, by your loss of arousal or erection, then we can get to work on processing the source of the anger. If your partner has been blaming you for something, or judging you, or not appreciating or respecting you for something, and then you go to have sex with her, and are unable to get aroused, sorting through your own feelings about how she had been treating you up to this point, is what will help the erection come back.

Another option, is if you have a pattern of losing interest in being in relationship with someone, let’s say for 3 months or 6 months, and a year has gone by in a newer relationship, and the sex just doesn’t seem to be working as well as it did in the beginning, we may need to address some deeper core issues around commitment, intimacy, and the desire for freedom. This falls more into attachment styles, and if you have a tendency to be dismissive or avoidant in your relationships, and don’t know why you have lost your interest to be close, intimate or even sexual, we will look at the source of this. ¬†Often it is something way deeper than you think!

Another possibility is if you are still in love with your ex! Let’s say you got into a new relationship and perhaps at your core, were not done grieving your ex, there’s a chance that you still are in love with your ex, and the energy between you and your ex also is still attached. This happens on a psychic level, and we will then do a spiritual energy cleansing process I call Cord Cutting, to help detach you from your ex, so you can feel your own body, and experience your life from a fresh start!

To go deeper into this possibility (still being in love with your ex), let’s say you are still in a committed marriage or relationship, and you decide to open it up and have an affair or perhaps your wife/beloved is fully aware of you seeing someone else, and your body is not a match for the decision you made! Your body, and your genitals, are telling you, that you are still committed to someone else, and you may have guilt, or a lack of integrity with yourself about the new relationship! Then you may be fully ok with dating, friendly, happy, playful, and can cuddle and even have great foreplay, but when the act of sex comes around, you shut down!

Massage and stimulation won’t alter your bodies response to what’s going on inside of you. If your erection is weak, or missing all together, the answer is not a physical stimulation, or even a drug that changes your physical reaction. The answer is what is underneath your bodies response. Our bodies are very powerful tools for what is going on inside of us, and whether you are a man or a woman, it doesn’t make a difference. Your body will communicate to tell you what is going on emotionally, mentally, energetically, and spiritually. We are a spiritual body, and often the answer to a pain, or in this case, a lack of arousal, you have to look much deeper than the physical. You can stimulate for hours and days upon days, until your sore or bruised, but it won’t transform the reaction until you do the real work; whats waiting inside of you; your heart, your feelings, your core emotional and spiritual self!

There are many sources of what is causing your erection to not be as strong as it used to be, and if we find out the source, often we can also find the solution!

Much Love and Joy to your passionate journey of yourself!

Asttarte

TrueTantra.net and AsttarteDeva.com

Integrity and Sexual Energy

Integrity and Sexual EnergyScenario: I am greeted by my ex-lover with a friendly hello. He shows up spontaneously where I tell him I’ll be. We speak in tongue with joy, ease and lightness. He asks to find out what I’m doing over the next few days, with enthusiasm, excitement, and curiosity. The next day I send information on events that look fun, and things we have in common. I hear nothing back. The day after, I send more information on very cool events, and hear nothing back. The next day, he finally responds, and says, “I never said we were definitely doing anything. I told you I may have had to work.” Now, I already had plans, but I was willing to be flexible to meet him. However, the lack of communication, being left in the dark, confused of if this person would want to meet or not, was emotionally and physically debilitating. Not in a real debilitating sense, however, a psychic one.

If someone you care for exclaims they want to get together, and leaves on that note, and then later completely disappears and doesn’t respond, its confusing for the psyche. It leaves someone in the unknown, and in a way, its how they keep their control on you. This then impacts the heart chakra. For women, and men, who care for their loved one, and were left feeling joyous they would meet very soon, but then never heard a word from them, its like giving mixed messages. The heart then is confused. The heart doesn’t know whether to be open, or shut down, out of this loved one saying one thing, feeling enthusiastic, and doing another, and being distant. I will go more in depth in the psychology of this on my lovers blog, however, here, I will discuss how this affects the heart chakra and ones sexual energy.

3dheartsufferingsm-a2d

When you leave your loved one thinking you’ll meet or at least talk in a day or two, are excited about the possibility, and then never hear from them, your spiritual body goes through a complex process of releasing someone’s lack of integrity. If you believe someone whole heartedly, at least to the point that their enthusiasm and encouragement on meeting was real, then you expect them to follow through with getting in contact.

However, when you hear nothing, you may begin to question:

  • why you trusted them in the first place,
  • why you were so excited and doubt yourself thinking maybe they never did want to meet
  • question if you were confused about their intentions
  • or perhaps be angry that they said one thing and did another
  • or perhaps try to give them the benefit of the doubt that they never confirmed anything

However, if someone said they wanted to do something and would be in touch, and then they don’t, they are clearly not telling the truth. They are giving you mixed messages and making you believe them, to either side, whether they wanted to meet, or didn’t want to. This is insanity and crazy. There’s no reason to believe someone like this. They are in. They are out. Who knows! It depends on what they feel like, and not on how you feel or what they said.

This affects the heart chakra, and the heart then shuts down. It may shut down to this person, but also to other people when you were wide open, loving, enthusiastic and trusting, to then being confused, perhaps sad, and closing off your trust. When the heart chakra gets toyed with, has sadness, disappointment, or feels betrayed, it then impacts the sexual arousal, the root and second chakras (the arousal of a female and male’s sexual organs), and erection for men would be difficult, and arousal and juiciness for women would disappear. This type of person is possibly harmful to someone’s psyche and best to walk away, unless you are unattached, and don’t care about an outcome either way, and have a laissez faire attitude about it. If you do care, and your feelings matter, find your enthusiasm with someone who can be trusted! You never know what you’re going to get with someone who can’t follow through with what they say. And, its certainly not fun! And we do want all the fun we can have, especially for the summer! So, as they say in one of my favorite movies: “Pish, tosh!” (Throw it away!)

 

Desire After Being Single

desire after being singleDesire After Being Single

What happens after you’ve spent a long time being single after a breakup? I know there are many of you out there. You end a long term relationship with someone, for very psychological reasons, and choose to be alone to get over them fully, not jumping into a new relationship out of fear of being alone. You are perfectly content with being alone, and don’t choose to get involved with someone creating what they call a “rebound relationship”. Your desire starts coming back, and you want to make the right choices with who to be with. This is more a Relationship Coaching post (that I would normally post on MyLoverMyBestFriend.wordpress.com), however, there are also elements of Tantra in it as well.

You have a craving for passion, and yet, aren’t finding partners you feel aligned with, are not a good match, or perhaps aren’t even attracted to at all. Perhaps you’ve become more serious, or want to choose more seriously, not jumping into something out of lust or sexual frustration. However, you also have needs. You are a human being. Needs for pleasure and desire are perfectly normal.

What have you done to take care of those needs? What you choose to do, hopefully is done out of healthy reasons. Some, I’m sure will go to bars, strip clubs, and some men out there even go so far as calling a prostitute, a surrogate, or sexual healer. However, those aren’t always an option, and sometimes they are not good choices.

Going to Cuddle gatherings is a great way to receive the nurturing touch you need, and perhaps find a new play partner at the same time.

Finding someone who is willing to be a cuddle buddy, or be a buddy in general is a great solution.

Finding a friend who is a casual connection and there is a attraction as well, is a great way to support that need for passion and desire.

Perhaps you want to find someone who would love to do a massage trade is a good answer.

Perhaps joining a group of something you’re interested in.

Perhaps a poly group, a swingers club, or even a book club.

And, some like to go to events such as Om (Orgasmic Meditation) through One Taste to fulfill their needs.

And others like to just hang out with friends, looking for that special someone and practice orgasms for one.

Whatever you choose, know you are not alone! There are others out there too, and you can find ways to fulfill your desires in your way, and in your own style!

Sacred Foot Massage

Sacred Foot MassageSacred Foot Massage

Bubbles, warm water, and lavender oil await your longing feet to be touched, pampered and adored for an hour of intimate bliss and love! To be touched, and embraced with kindness opens up the heart, clears ones energy, and allows one to surrender into the experience of receiving; being nurtured, pampered, appreciated, respected and offered unconditional love.

I love watching someone melt, and relax in peace, knowing they are in safe arms, cared for, and can surrender their true feelings. It is fulfilling to give the gift of love, and be received with gratitude that they allowed you to help release their stresses, sadness, or anxiety, and opened their heart.

Sacred Foot Massage is much more than a massage. It is a full body experience of bliss, energy cleansing, pampering, and opening up to the greater gift of ones own heart, as the heart melts its fears, worries, concerns and stresses, and can relax into the unknown, as though time was nonexistent. A true healing experience in formed, and with delight and trust, sometimes ones heart opens even greater and tears of love release from the body, as the stress leaves and changes form.

The opposite of stress and anxiety is bliss. As the body shifts the stress, it opens up to a kundalini wave of energy flowing that takes over and manifests as bliss. Bliss is a full body feeling of pleasure, however, pleasure does not necessarily mean sexual. It can mean a spiritual cleansing of ones own energy center. In many cases, however, orgasm manifests, and takes over inside and outside, as deeper breaths rise, energy expands and love abounds!

Sacred Foot Massage includes a consultation/coaching part of the session, discussion of current or recent issues, blocks and obstacles, and desires of where to arrive/goals to achieve. Then the session includes a hand to the heart, guided deep breathing, and then getting ready to soak the feet in a tub of warm bubbly water. Then massage is experienced on one foot at a time, dripping water to the rest of the leg, and massaging the rest of the leg. Then the other foot and leg is done. Often a blanket will rest over the upper part of the body, with a pillow behind the persons head and room to stretch out as they relax deeper. After the feet are done, deeper massing into the thighs is experienced, and then more of a sensual nature massage takes form. As the person surrenders they may experience full body orgasm, and as they come to rest, I may rest my hand on their heart again, or put my arm around them to allow them to surrender into the bliss and love just received. Sometimes it takes a moment to get grounded and integrate from this experience, so I will sit with them and hold them until they feel settled and ready to get up.

This is an example of one of the Spiritual Tantra Sessions I offer. There are many other examples.

Much Love and Blessings,

Asttarte

Heart Opening

Heart Opening

Heart Opening

I am so utterly and deeply grateful for this past weeks experience, of heart opening, divine inner union, peace and love, and deep connected healing intimacy. As a practitioner, I too, need nurturing, love and connectedness from those who are not my followers or clients, but also to those on a personal intimate level. It has been near one year since my Beloved and I parted ways, and I knew this time, it would sadly be the last. I’ve taken this past year in grieving, letting go, and doing what I could to heal my heart. However, the experience this past week took me over the edge of that heart opening in a way that has been needed for perhaps years.

I went to a spiritual retreat, one that had similarities near and dear to my heart. I’ve been going to see Amma since 1999, however, this event, was unique. Not only did I get to experience the love, kindness and healing of the guru who was leading the retreat, but also got to experience a connected love with a special being who was at this retreat. Perhaps we were breaking a rule, in connecting on an intimate level, however, my heart was screaming yes, and my spirit was leading the way. My soul made the choice to follow this feeling, and in doing so, my heart got to receive a deep connection of love that had kept it guarded for many years. A being who shares love, without concern, without judgment, or body armor, and can just be in the moment, listening, with presence, being intuitively guided, and following his own heart, speaks loudly to my own being. To be touched with divine presence, listening, and an inner knowing, left me speechless, and in absolute joy. My heart broke open as tears ran down my face. He had no idea how long I had been waiting for this heart connection, one that I cannot teach. This way of being must come from within. This way of being must already be known from the lover connecting to the lover. I cannot make another person learn how to be present, to know how to love without pressure, or neediness, clinginess, demanding energy or fear. Whoever, you are, you must come from a place of deep love, and this love is already a part of you. I am grateful to have connected with a being who could offer this, and offer it without expectation.

When a woman receives love in such a way, she has an opportunity to open up her flower, to open up her beauty, her radiance, her power, her pleasure and her joy. She cannot be forced to connect with another. She cannot be expected to be wide open immediately. She must trust her inner knowing, her instincts, and her truth. In this, an expansiveness arises and healing returns!

Love,

Asttarte

He inspired me to let go of worry, and write a book about a topic most definitely needed. I am jumping on this creative passion right now!

Awakening Bliss

awakening bliss

Awakening Bliss

“In order to access your full potential of bliss,
you have to clear the muck that’s in the way!

We are all Spiritual beings living in a physical body. Our spiritual body is mostly unknown to people on the planet; except those who are conscious and on the path. It is my pleasure and joy to work with those who are on the path, and to those who are not, to learn the power and value in getting started.

I offer you many techniques and practices on this website that took me many years to learn and practice, and many more to master. It is the utmost importance to allow the spirit to be of a significant factor in your journey of reflection, your recovery to healing, your awakening to the divine, and your passionate desire to connect to others.

Bliss is not something that can be achieved through simple pleasures of the ego, the mind or the body. Bliss is achieved through connecting to something much bigger than we all are – the metaphysical, transcendental, ethereal and energetic part of ourselves that lies not only inside of us, but all around us. Achieving bliss is a state of mind through conscious efforts in connecting to our spiritual selves.

Bliss can be achieved through the body, but there are always energetic blocks that keep us from fully expanding and opening into a higher vibration that our divine being is craving for us to embrace. When we can merge the physical body with the spiritual body, we can then achieve a full body state of ecstatic bliss.