Vulnerability into Pleasure

vulnerability into pleasureVulnerability into Pleasure

Many people think tantra is just a term and an excuse to be sexual and erotic.
That is the furthest from the truth of what tantra truly is.
The purpose of tantra is not to be erotic
But to be loved.
How is tantra a path to feel love, but not feel erotic?
The answer is, it’s both.
Safety and love must come before feeling sexual, period.
If someone tries to feel erotic before feeling safe and love,
they’re skipping too many steps ahead.
Go back a few steps, and you might end up where you want to be.
Maybe you don’t need to feel safe.
Maybe you don’t have a single bone of softness in you.
Maybe you can jump into the sexual, before the sensual.
There is a layer of vulnerability there, you are unwilling to see.
Consider every human has fragile emotions.
You might just be covering yours up with erotic energy.
Slow down a little bit, and you’ll feel love energy.
Give your partner a chance to catch up to your sexual energy,
and you’ll both be a match
And intimate love will never be the same.

Do you feel anxious, irritable or frustrated?
What is it you are not letting yourself feel?
What are the feelings that are hiding underneath the surface?
What emotions are you hiding from?
What feelings popped up in a moment, and then went away soon after?
The pop up feelings are a clue. Dig deeper.
Surrender to them. Breathe into them. Feel them.
Notice. Investigate. Become a detective to your own feelings.
Is it anger? Breathe into anger.
Is it sadness? Breathe into sadness.
It is regret? Breathe into regret.
Is it despair? Breathe into despair.
Is it joy? Breathe into joy.
Is it love? Breathe into love.
Any feeling you feel, and breathe into, will make the feeling bigger, and either move through your body and let go, or feel more love, more joy, and more pleasure as you breathe into them.
Breathing into anger, despair, regret, sadness is loving them, and they will surrender, breathe through you, drop into nothingness, and transform into pleasure.
Tantra is a path of healing.
What is it you are healing today?
What parts of yourself are you expanding?
How will you shift vulnerability into pleasure today?

No one is ever going to be the same energy level at exactly
the same time every time you desire it.
Someone is going to have to slow down and be patient for the other.
It’s never about forcing someone to meet you where you are,
But always about surrendering to meet them where they are.
Are you surrendering to your Beloved?
Are you making them feel safe, or threatened?
Are you putting frustration onto them, or love?
Can you go deeper into surrender with yourself?
With your lover?
It just might turn your frustration into bliss.
Don’t forget to breathe.
The breath is the key!
It is your vehicle. Your teacher. Your friend. Your lover.
Your life force. Your heart. A connection to your soul
Something SO much bigger than you.
It is your gift!
And you have it with you all the time.

Note: Read this again after meditating, and it will make more sense!

Love, Asttarte

How All Sessions Go

how all sessions goHow All Sessions Go

No matter what you’re looking for, no matter what your focus is, your goals, intentions, or needs, or “program” you feel fits you best, we will always have a conversation and coaching part of a session, prior to anything else. Before meeting, we will have a pre-screening process to determine your level of spiritual experience, interest and what your next steps of spiritual growth are. Then we determine if we are going deeper into a spiritual healing session (which always precedes any tantra work), or if we are doing more of a Coaching Session, which always precedes any Sex or Intimacy Coaching as well.

Even if someone is coming for health reasons, holistic healing, general massage, or emotional healing (such as grief work, anxiety, depression, anger, a break up, a death in the family, a challenge with their relationship or their sexual concerns), we will still have a coaching aspect to any session.

If someone comes for Erectile Dysfunction, or Pre-mature Ejaculation, we will still have Coaching and/or Counseling prior to any Session, to determine if it is energetic and emotional reasons, or health related, and the best approach to take.

If someone comes for Intimacy Issues and is manifesting the wrong partner, we will go into Coaching, to determine what the pattern is, the history of all relationships, the types of relationships manifested, and the common theme of what all the issues in those relationships come up. We may do emotional healing or energy clearing to release the blocks to the previous partners, or go into a Cuddle Session and Chakra Healing work, however, Coaching and all sorts of talking is part of the session, and is addressed in the same session.

Prior to any hands on or touching aspect of any session, spiritual healing work takes place. Often it is a meditation, chakra clearing session, or a tantra meditation, however, there are other tools used prior to hands on work that may be needed, but it is not determined what is best until after meeting and the issues that are important to work on. (And, if a talking aspect to a session is needed and takes a larger amount of time, and then a spiritual healing is needed after, a longer session would be recommended, or multiple sessions to get all aspects covered).

Sometimes Reiki or Aura Clearing is needed in order to do any hands on work. Reiki energy helps moves the energetic blocks and frees up the space around a person so they radiate a higher frequency. The energy around a person is often more significant then their physical body, and any layers that are guarded or heavy will need cleansing before physical touch and closeness. If someone’s energy is too heavy, too chaotic, anxious or fear based, I will either suggest seeking solely Spiritual Healing (with myself or another practitioner first), or a professional therapist to do emotional healing work (or they can work with me on this level also if they feel comfortable). Then after these layers have been addressed, we can move into more physical healing work.

My site IntuitiveSoulHealings.com talks more about healing the aura, energy body, and spiritual healing. And my site, MyLoverMyBestFriend.wordpress.com talks more about the Coaching aspect of the sessions, however, here at TrueTantra.net we merge those worlds all together, and combine a whole body experience, of spiritual cleansing and rejuvenation, coaching/or counseling for deeper emotional healing, and tantra and intimacy for going deeper into joy, pleasure and love! Every step counts and one leads to the next layer of creating a full body experience of bliss, joy, and profound peace and satisfaction!

And even working on healing the emotional layers of a person, can certainly and DEFINITELY take one to joy! Underneath all challenging feelings is love, and no matter what lays on top, love is always waiting!

Angry Cock

AngryCockAngry Cock

It might sound funny, but it is exactly what energy radiates from someone’s shaft if he himself is angry! I don’t mean being angry in one moment either. I mean, if his over-all personality, energy and mood is the majority of the time filled with anger, frustration, resentment, annoyance or even sexual frustration. When a woman goes to massage a male’s genitals, however he is feeling on the inside, his deeper core emotions, his cock will feel the exact same thing!

The energy of a man’s cock will take on the energy of his entire self. And, if he is desiring to connect with his beloved, she too, will feel the anger radiating off of him. She will feel his annoyance, and frustration, his impatience, his neediness, and overall anger beaming energy right off of his sacred area, in addition to his heart chakra, and everywhere else around him.

If his energy is angry and filled with these emotions mentioned above, often times a woman won’t want to connect with him, or will have a difficult time, because that energy is not a welcoming feeling. That energy actually pushes people away in the opposite direction, probably the opposite too of what he wishes they would do. An angry cock feels toxic, heavy and the opposite of loving; exactly what women desire to feel. And, if he is trying to connect to a woman, the best way to go about it, is for him to clear his angry energy first.

How Do You Clear Your Angry Cock?

The first step is to acknowledge that you might be angry. Even, if the majority of the time you think you are pretty peaceful, consider, that its possible your energy is not as peaceful as you think.

It’s possible that your cock is not angry, however, it still may have stress-filled energy around it that is causing the people, or person, in your life to have a certain reaction. And, even if that reaction is that she cannot orgasm or orgasms very little, that too is an indication that your energy is not as pure as your lover needs it to be.

The next step after acknowledging that your cock, and whole energy being, might have a certain frequency that is causing women around you to have a certain reaction, is to do your personal work.

How do you do that? The term processing might be overrated, but that’s one practice that is helpful. Find someone to talk to about your feelings, get it out in the open, and stop trying to deal with the stuff in your life all alone!

The next thing would be to take on spiritual or peace inducing practices; such as meditation, yoga, tai chi, chi gong, acupuncture, walks in nature, baths, drinking tea, etc.

Beyond this is to get a massage, but not just for the sexual frustration; the whole gamut! Get a massage, or energy healing session to release pent up energy in your entire being; your neck, shoulders, chest, back, hips, thighs, calves, hamstrings, arms, hands, feet, ankles, etc. And, when it’s time to remove pent up energy in your genitals, do it with consciousness, not with any intention to release an orgasm (not for a while at least), and remove any blocked energy of anger around your shaft.

This post is not just for women guys! It’s for men to truly get your woman, and help yourself so that you can clear and open yourself to be a match for what she desires; the authentic loving you she desired when you first met, those many moons ago!

So clear your energy and your cock feels peaceful, loving, and ultimately sexy! Isn’t that what you want your loved one(s) to feel from you anyway? ūüôā

Slow Sex is Best

Slow Sex is Best

Sex, sex, sex! Everyone loves to talk about sex! But sex to one person may mean something completely different to someone else. To one person it may mean going out to dinner, having a few glasses of wine, and coming home to jump in the bed with their hunny. To another, it may mean to stay in, put everything on hold, and do it right there on the spot, spontaneously wherever they feel like it. And to another, it may mean slow foreplay, lots of intimate massage, then taking as long as possible before removing their external articles, and moving as slowly as possible after.

Most people, and in particular, most guys, think the faster the better, but that can’t be further from the truth. Guys, and women too, feel a peak of desire, and want to rush to feel some form of satisfaction. They crave the feeling of pleasure, get impatient and even become aggressive with their own body. They almost in a sense, are taking out that sense of impatience and anger on them-self, for having waited to be intimate, and don’t realize that the slower they go, they more healing, nurturing and joy they experience within. And, too, the slowness creates an energy flow, the chi, and taoist energy movement, that allows even an emotional connection to their body, feelings and experience to take place. Sometimes, the slower, the more sensual and the more emotional. Often, there is no healing without slowness, no emotional connection, no vulnerability, no sadness, and also no electric orgasm either.

There are many vibrators out on the market, and many of them, have a speed that is much too fast to allow the person to have a true tantric emotional connection or healing experience. These ‘toys’ are targeted more for people who are unable to orgasm without them, and all too often, they over-stimulate a woman, creating a somewhat dependence on the toys, and it sets the woman up for being unable to have any pleasure or release with her own partner (or herself for that matter). She then needs the toy after being with her partner, and then her husband, or boyfriend, etc. feels left out, unloved, not included in her pleasure, and it sets him up to feel failure as a lover; which is probably completely off base. She just trained herself to received pleasure from some foreign object, and can’t experience pleasure without it. Guys, it’s not your fault!

However, there is hope! Women can retrain themselves to slow down, and men can feel the satisfaction of connecting with his sweetheart and beloved deeply once again! First, I’d like to say, is that it IS possible. You first have to put the toy away. Hide it in a trunk, or the attic for a while. Try something different. Try slowing down, breathing, working with your own energy, your own breath, a gentle touch, and let your emotions come to the surface. It will create a spiral and circulating effect of self love, love for your partner, and a connection much deeper than two people experiencing a superficial orgasm at two separate times and in two different ways can ever do.

If two people in a relationship, are both desiring to be sexual, get close, but one is angry, another is frustrated, depressed, or experiencing anything other than love, fast sex often seems like the quick solution to connect and attempt to make all those feelings go away. But, those feelings don’t go away, without acknowledging them, truly feeling them, being with them, and loving them into disappearance.

Slow sex, and slow intimacy is the only way to truly acknowledge your partner, love him or her, and create a connection that is worth experiencing. Why rush when you can have so much more? 

 

Arousal as Energy Movement

Arousal as Energy Movement

Arousal as Energy MovementArousal as Energy Movement

What happens after a relationship ends, or you have taken an enormous amount of time to be alone? (The relationship might as well be over if that’s the case). And definitely the case if your partner had a fear of intimacy (See recent posts from other blog MyLoverMyBestFriend.wordpress.com for more writing on fear of intimacy).

What happens to your body after you’ve gone through the grieving and letting go process, and you’re ready to start dating again, or having an interest in connecting with others after all that time?

What usually happens, is your body will start telling you that you are ready. It will have desires with certain people you are attracted to, or give you sudden urges and nudges¬†to push you to talk to someone. But what happens when you’re by yourself, and you are starting to finally open up again after all that time alone? Your body may have waves of energy movement, or jolts of sudden arousal. It may feel orgasmic, but then when you go to pleasure yourself, you may still feel certain blocks to experience a full body experience of arousal, i.e.. orgasm.

The arousal is your bodies way of telling you that you have gotten through most of the grieving process of your ex lover (husband, wife, etc) and it has achieved a level of balance, equilibrium and harmony of energy and wants to move to a higher place of joy. You completed the cycle of sadness, solitude and aloneness after the hard core break up. You took the time you needed to rest, recover, release anxiety, stress and sadness from your previous beloved, and now your body has awaken, and it wants to wake you up to match how it feels.

It can happen anywhere; your kitchen while you are cooking a meal, your car while singing to a song you love, cleaning your home, reading, talking to a friend, or even meditating or taking a bath. When your body is ready to open to a higher level of pleasure, it doesn’t matter what you are doing or who you are with. It will move and rise within you no matter what!

If you talking to a friend in person or over the phone and you definitely don’t want that friendship to turn into something different, be careful! You may want to hang up the phone or leave the current situation to allow your body to experience how it’s feeling. Otherwise, that friendship might just turn romantic pretty quickly!

If you want the friendship to turn into something else, and your friend had been waiting for you to be ready and open, awesome! Or, you are neutral and don’t care if this person will remain your friend or turn into something else, that may be time to have a discussion. However, if you have the discussion on the spot, changes will happen almost dramatically! A more rational stand would be to walk away, take care of yourself, and then talk to your friend later after the feeling of sexual arousal and frustration has calmed down.

I’ve discovered a practice called the Deer Exercise for women and men in my recent search on this topic. This is a taoist energy practice to help move and awaken someone who has been suppressed or shut down for a long time. If you are no longer suppressed and feel the energy already excited, this practice may actually just balance you and help release some of the pent up sexual frustration, and perhaps help you relieve the sexual frustration a little easier. However, I find the Shamanic Breathwork and Tantra Meditations to be more powerful. Whatever you choose is your choice, and your body will let you know what is best!

Feel free to give the Deer Exercise a try. Who knows it might help! If anything it will help keep your energies open and your body in overall health and vitality! Enjoy!

For women:

For men and women:

Heart Opening

Heart Opening

Heart Opening

I am so utterly and deeply grateful for this past weeks experience, of heart opening, divine inner union, peace and love, and deep connected healing intimacy. As a practitioner, I too, need nurturing, love and connectedness from those who are not my followers or clients, but also to those on a personal intimate level. It has been near one year since my Beloved and I parted ways, and I knew this time, it would sadly be the last. I’ve taken this past year in grieving, letting go, and doing what I could to heal my heart. However, the experience this past week took me over the edge of that heart opening in a way that has been needed for perhaps years.

I went to a spiritual retreat, one that had similarities near and dear to my heart. I’ve been going to see Amma since 1999, however, this event, was unique. Not only did I get to experience the love, kindness and healing of the guru who was leading the retreat, but also got to experience a connected love with a special being who was at this retreat. Perhaps we were breaking a rule, in connecting on an intimate level, however, my heart was screaming yes, and my spirit was leading the way. My soul made the choice to follow this feeling, and in doing so, my heart got to receive a deep connection of love that had kept it guarded for many years. A being who shares love, without concern, without judgment, or body armor, and can just be in the moment, listening, with presence, being intuitively guided, and following his own heart, speaks loudly to my own being. To be touched with divine presence, listening, and an inner knowing, left me speechless, and in absolute joy. My heart broke open as tears ran down my face. He had no idea how long I had been waiting for this heart connection, one that I cannot teach. This way of being must come from within. This way of being must already be known from the lover connecting to the lover. I cannot make another person learn how to be present, to know how to love without pressure, or neediness, clinginess, demanding energy or fear. Whoever, you are, you must come from a place of deep love, and this love is already a part of you. I am grateful to have connected with a being who could offer this, and offer it without expectation.

When a woman receives love in such a way, she has an opportunity to open up her flower, to open up her beauty, her radiance, her power, her pleasure and her joy. She cannot be forced to connect with another. She cannot be expected to be wide open immediately. She must trust her inner knowing, her instincts, and her truth. In this, an expansiveness arises and healing returns!

Love,

Asttarte

He inspired me to let go of worry, and write a book about a topic most definitely needed. I am jumping on this creative passion right now!

Favorite Sessions Right Now!

Favorite Sessions Right Now!

Favorite Sessions Right NowAsttarte’s site is being revamped into a professional Holistic Healing Center. There are some videos that need to be done and some pages, but it is up for your viewing!

Asttarte’s Favorite Sessions Right Now are:

 Holistic Emotional Energy Therapy Sessions; a form of deep emotional healing and clearing I created on my own that is very powerful and effective.

¬†Transformational Life Coaching Sessions; to get complete and clear with what’s blocking you from having ANYTHING you need or desire!!!

Energy Clearing of the aura, energy field, vibrational healing for the stress, toxins and chaotic energy around the body which effects the emotional, mental and physical.

Cord Cutting for energetically clearing someone who is seriously impacting your life to be severed from your mind, and spirit at a more minimal level, or clearing the karmic relationship ties to this person from the past, so you can live free and be who you are today!

Phone Sessions of Life or Relationship Coaching, Long Distance Healing, Meditation, Spiritual Guidance and Spiritual Training.

Reiki Massage; a gentle, soothing and nurturing massage to release emotional debris, energetic debris and arouse your senses to a place of stillness, peace and love for the self again!

“One does not need to know what type of Session they want, or even what they need to heal. All they need to know is that they want to.” ¬†Asttarte Deva

See more on energy clearing and spiritual healing at IntuitiveSoulHealings.com